The Single Mom Life: Are you fighting to hang on to your struggle?

Oh the joy of single motherhood.  There have been so many gifts inside of this experience and the stories that I’ve created around it over the last 4 years.

Being broke has taught me to be more creative.

Through being fatigued, I’ve learned to allow myself to go with the flow.

Losing my patience countless times has taught me to breathe deeply.

And putting myself on the back burner has taught me to start taking care of myself better.

The greatest gift inside of single motherhood hasn’t been overcoming the daily struggles, but goes much deeper for me…

Having this story of single motherhood has drawn in so much support and love for me and my daughters.  In the earlier times, people would show up at my door with dinners, and groceries, and offers for help.  Even a break to go take a shower, or brush my teeth I was so grateful for.  My friends, family, and clients would cheer me on, and tell me how strong I was.

There have been times where I have been financially supported inside of this story.

There are lots of times where I let myself off the hook with my health and my body.

And as the relationship with my ex husband remained continued to remain strained, the greater the stories around my glorified victim-hood became.

I’ve never felt so loved and supported, and vindicated than during my journey as a single mom.  But when did I start to believe that I am only deserving of love and support when I am weak?

The challenge I face now, is not the fear that I am not enough, or that I am failing as a mom.  The challenge is that growing into a greater version of yourself, comes with a responsibility and accountability for your own situation, and your own results.  No more blaming outside conditions for the results that you create in your life.  The fear is breaking through the realization and possibility that I am worthy of love and support, even in my wholeness.

You have to decide which master you are going to serve.  The greater version of yourself leading you to the light, or the dark shadows inside your mind that tell you it’s not safe to grow.

You have to hold yourself to a higher standard.  You have to take radical accountability for your experience.

It’s so warm and cozy in an existence when no one around you expects anything greater from you.  

But you can’t have a successful business, and healthy finances but still buy into the story that you’re unsupported by your ex husband.

and you can’t blame your kids for the amount of sleep you did or didn’t get, when you don’t even make self care a priority to begin with.

You can’t blame the fast food restaurant for the 30 lbs you’ve kept on since giving birth when it’s you who chooses to keep going through the drive-thru.

What steps can you take TODAY to let go of the smaller story, to be able to upgrade to the greater version of yourself?

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